A sermon and weekend review

The sermon on Sunday was about friends who disappear when you need them the most.  The friends who are not there because they do not know how to be, or because they choose not to be.  Our pastor spoke about people who have lost their children or spouse and how the friends they thought would be there for them suddenly were not, and the people on the "margins" - those friends you do not see often or speak to frequently - all of a sudden stepped up and were the greatest support.  It was the first time in a long time that I didn't cry in church.  It was like this sermon was practically written for me.

I love my friends.  Most of them have been there for us in the best way that they know how.  Some of them are wrapped up in their own lives and disappeared when we needed them the most.  They got frustrated because they didn't understand the situation, so rather than simply listening, they let their exasperation get the best of them and took it out on us.  And then friends that we rarely talk to were starting prayer chains, starting fundraisers, and their own hearts were breaking - all for our boys.  It really rings true, that old saying: "you find out who your real friends are."

Some of our favorite things for the boys came from strangers who were touched by their story.  We have gotten wind chimes, gift baskets, stars named after them, prayer chains for them, and so many cards I can't even count, many of which include stories of other people's losses. Our church paid for the boys' cremation, and the funeral director, having lost three children himself, waived their costs.  The wonderful families who donated hats and blankets as well as money for memory boxes to the hospital have done more than they could imagine.  Just over the weekend I wandered into the boys' nursery and held their hats, remembering what it was like to hold my beautiful boys.

A cross, given to us by a mother who lost her own daughter.  It is next to a Precious Moments figurine that my mom and I bought together years and years ago, named "Safe in the Arms of Jesus"

A wind chime, given to us by my sister's work

The engraving on the wind chime

The poem that came with the wind chime

The rest of the weekend went surprisingly well.  Miranda got loose from the yard, unbeknownst to me.  I was watering the plants in the front yard and all of a sudden a dog came pouncing at me from all the way down the street. Imagine my surprise when I turned around and saw it was my own.  So, we spent Saturday having to fix the busted fence gate.  Sunday and Monday were spent at my parent's house, eating so much food that I am terrified to step on a scale.  Luckily, we burned off a ton of calories helping our friends clear out trees at their new house yesterday.  Today my mom starts radiation and chemo. Yesterday may have been the last day in a long time that I was able to see my mom not sick.  So starts a week that I really, really do not want to start.