via Project Heal
When my sister-in-law texted me saying, "OMG! 18 months!"
And it took me a second to realize she was talking about my sons.
Whose birthday I forgot.
Even though my Google calendar sent me a reminder.
Time is cruel. It passes by so slowly and so quickly, all at once.
I still say good morning and good night to them, everyday.
I pray for them every night.
I look at Jordan and wonder who she resembles the most.
I wonder how I will tell her about them.
I wonder if they are happy.
I wonder if they forgive me.
I wonder who they would have been.
These thoughts... I have them every day. Time is cruel, there's no way around it. Forgetting or missing special milestones feels like a dagger to the heart, but don't be hard on yourself. Time goes by too quickly, and life somehow gets in the way.
ReplyDeleteAnd I know I say don't feel guilty, and I do the same thing.. Tell myself not too, but it's inevitable.
Maybe instead, forgive yourself. The boys most certainly would <3
Something I work on daily. Thank you, as always Cat, for helping me through :)
DeleteHappy 1/2 birthday boys! Halfway to 2 years is unreal.
ReplyDeleteThanks Kate!
DeleteHappy (belated) birthday boys!
ReplyDelete<3 Hugs hon. I hope your boys are in paradise with my babies living the good life and waiting for us.
ReplyDeleteI have done that - forgotten that it was another month. It happens. It's ok. Like you said, you think about them all the time and they know how much they are loved. Happy 18 months boys!
ReplyDelete